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"This is a Humour Article. All will not be forgiven."



"I love it! Do you have a name for this bad boy!?" - Anonmyous contractor shooting the AM-400

"I call it Dick Justice" - Anonmyous contractor

"How Original"- Krispen overhearing the guards in the next room over

AM-400 Slaughtering Viper

Type:

Shoulder fired Gatling gun

Role:

Light Machine Compensator

Manufacturer:

Mandrake Heavy Industries

AC Installments:

Ace Combat: 52 Pickup, Ace Combat: Frisky Disco (Expansion)

Primary Operators:

MHI Security Guards

Secondary Operators:

Krispen, Osean Ground Defense Force (tested for use in 1984 never adopted)

Caliber:

5.56x45mm

Fire Rate:

5000 rounds per minute, 6666 rounds per minute (Fast Forward)

Magazine Type/Capacity:

Disposable 60 round ammo “cassettes” with continuous playback, fixed magazine can also double as a fishing reel or retractable clothesline

Fire Modes:

Full Automatic Only, Safety provided by jamming a steering wheel club in the barrel hub

Too many parameters

Overview

The AM-400 Slaughtering Viper was a man portable shoulder fired Gatling gun produced by Mandrake Heavy Industries in the late 1980’s marketed to military customers as a “Light Machine Compensator”. It also holds the distinction of being the only firearm in existence marketed as a children’s toy by the now defunct Otaku Toys company.

Development

During the 1980s the Cod War had heated up with both sides spending money to continually build increasingly ridiculous weapons to annihilate each while fueling the military industrial complex. An angry albeit whiny portion of the OGDF brass decided that the Army needed to replace in their words “A poopy Jam-O-Matic assault rifle” known as the M16A1 in service with “Something that can beat that full auto communist hate machine” known as the AK-74. In 1982 a contract competition was held to develop a superior combat rifle to the M16A1 by the end of the decade, with Mandrake Heavy Industries bribing their way into the competition with prostitutes and golf games for each of the army ordinance officers involved in testing.

Mandrakes entry into the competition was a miniaturized version of the crew served GE M134 minigun that was generally used in helicopter gunships or very loud and flashy Hollywood action movies. The development process of the weapon dated back to 1978 when an M134 was brought to the company’s research and development department (known for their work on such products as the F/A1L-18 and 7000 series toaster ovens). The challenge posed to the engineers was to miniaturize the gun and make it into a man portable weapon for individual infantry use with a shoestring budget and having to use off the shelf components in its construction. The only components on hand at the time of the development were circuit boards from washing machines, plastic and metal parts from refrigerators, touchpad’s from microwave ovens, some D Cell batteries, bales of wire, the lower receiver of an M16A1 rifle, and the M134 itself. Weeks of long winded musical montages, slaving over a hot oven left open to make the engineers work faster and harder, several packs of Pabst Blue Ribbon, liberal use of epoxy and glitter paid off as the first prototype was revealed to the board of directors.

The board immediately fell in love with the weapon as this was the late 1970’s and the use of cocaine was rampant amongst corporate yuppies looking for an upper to spice up their extremely bland lives. The board green lighted pre production prototypes but flaws were found to be present in the weapon. The epoxy used to bond components of the weapon crumbled under heat or exposure to moisture, glitter was not camouflage, and the ammunition feed was all but non existent as the belt feed was converted into a cigarette roller for the mailroom. The weapon was immediately refined with a new ammunition feed system that used a fixed magazine and a cassette like roll of ammunition was fed into the weapon breech once it was placed on the powered spool. Barrel count and caliber were downsized to accommodate weight and maneuverability with three 5.56mm caliber barrels in place of the original six 7.62mm caliber barrels. A microwave touchpad (powered by D cell) was converted to provide two modes for the weapon fully automatic and fast forward which used the powered ammunition magazine and barrels to increase overall fire rate from 5000 to 6666 rounds per minute making  the weapons sixty round pack even more short lived than ever. To save weight the safety was omitted from the weapon in favor of a more manual option jamming a steering wheel club in the barrel hub as it spooled down. However this did little to stop accidental firing. By 1984 this version of the weapon was undergoing consideration by the OGDF in its Super Duper Awesome Rifle Competition or SDARC for short after the company furiously bribed its way through the initial phase despite the death of two trying to set the gun on safe. Its competition came in the form of the Belkan Heckler and Koch G11 which was described to operate on “Kraut Space Magic” by the Osean military brass who had no clue how to read a coloring book much less the sales brochure and Osean made AAI ACR which shot fin stabilized projectiles encased in a discarding sabot from a smoothbore barrel which was considered a lousy excuse for a nail gun. In the end the SDARC was considered a generalized failure after only six days of  real testing and the constant absence of the ordinance officers who were off playing golf and screwing hookers to even care. As a result all companies lost out on a chance to produce the next generation assault rifle for the Osean Military due to MHI constantly meddling in the affairs of the process. By 1986 the far more practical and successful Colt M16A2 was adopted to arm to the Osean Marines and eventually the Ground Defense Force as well, however the AM-400 would continue production until 1990 marketed as a Light Machine Gun or Compensator as they called it arming the company’s private security forces, rebel riff raff looking for a scary ass gun to intimidate their lousy puppet oppressors, and terrorists despite its dismal operation. To compensate for their financial loss the gun was sold off the Otaku Toys corporation (later known for its work on the XV-22 Failsprey) as a full automatic metal dart gun  for children called “Fluffy Mauling Cuddly Behemoth” after a lovable cartoon canine of the same name. It was pulled off the market in 1993 for causing accidental choking deaths, severe cases of lead poisoning, and electrical fires. Mandrake would recover due to their meteoric sales of the new SUB-Z Refrigerator and Freezer and their new 9001 Industrial Toaster Oven.

At War

The AM-400 never saw combat use during the Bakan War of 1995 as the Belkans and Allies were using much more practical small arms but the Slaughtering Viper saw action on the battlefields of Wielvakia in 1994 during the pensioner crisis albeit sitting idle while their owners decided their fate by chessboard and again in 1998 during the Usean Teen Rebellion as millions of angst ridden teens rose up against their parental units in RAGE but this role was also limited as ample supplies of spitballs and more practical weapons were available. The weapon sat idle until 2013 when the procrastinating Doujin Artist and Advisor to Otaku Industries Krispen conducted a mission for the Osean Government codenamed Operation Frisky Disco to cripple Mandrake Heavy Industries program of producing the ultimate Oven Based super weapon.

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